Funny facts : SAP employees about SAP software

octubre 12, 2008

1. SAP is such a great software that initially there weren’t any errors. But in order to have any work to do at all, they made up some bugs.
2. SAP expects the Spanish Inquisition
3. The matrix runs SAP
4. The song “Killing me softly” was originally written by a SAP customer
5. Oracle runs SAP

6. SAP XI is used by Pentagon to translate alien radio signals to plain english
7. SAP is so secure that condoms are made from it
8. What Yoda really meant to say about the force: Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to ABAP.
8. When SAP NetWeaver was released, there was a disturbance in the Force
8. By reading the source code of transaction SE38 you will temporarily be granted invisibility
11. SAP is so efficient in creating software, there is actually only one developer writing code, all others are architects and managers.
11. SAP stand for SLOW AND PAINFUL
11. SAP can divide by zero.
14. HAL9000 ran 4.6C and spoke to Dave through a voice interface via EP6 SP2. While in transit the upgrade to SP9 was performed. There were issues………..
15. The “Blue Pill” takes you to Walldorf.
16. SAP made Bill Gates retire. When asked why, SAP answered “Because we can”
16. “ABAP is the only language understood by aliens” – SETI
16. In the ABAP forum some SDNers use the Psychic Friends Network to predict the next question to have the answer ready before it even has been posted.
19. In the US Army, SAPpers are combat engineers.
19. SAP NetWeaver is based on alien technology
21. SAP wins a patent for all technologies whose names have 3-letter acronyms: ERP, CRM, MDM, XML, ESA, SOA etc…
22. Oracle still hides the fact that FUSION stands for: Finally use SAP in our network
23. SAP stands for Start Applying Patches
24. Reading SDN every day keeps the consultant away.
25. One discovered a new planet: SDN World. Rumours say that the population is growing fast on this planet.
26. Chuck Norris uses SAP to keep track of his death count
27. Yes, even Larry Ellison is a homo SAPience
28. Not 42, but SAP is the answer to life, the universe, and everything.
29. The European Union has decided that by 2008, ABAP will be the only offical language used in parliament
30. SAP: It’s not just a job; it’s a wardrobe.
31. There is only one number greater than the number of transactions in a SAP system – the number of people that Mark and Craig want to turn into SDN community members.
32. One day in the near future SDN points will replace the dollar as the preferred method of payment
33. Read in Wikipedia under the term Oracle: “… the use of Oracle bones dates as far back as the Shai Dynasty”
34. SAP = MS^2
34. If you post a question in the SDN ABAP forum, Rich Heilman already has the answer typed in and is just waiting for you to press the “Post Message” button.
36. Contrary to popular belief, Walldorf is actually the centre of the universe
37. SAP only made its software so complicated because this way they were able to lay the foundation for the vast SDN community that would soon replace all SAP developers. As SDN points are easier to give away than monetary salary, the company’s increase in profitability is expected to crush all existing stock software, making place for SAP to installed in there, which would increase sales again … all in order with the SDN program (SAP Dies Never).
37. Do you think SAP break the cars engine of F1 Team McLaren ?
39. A popular sentence when dating: “MySAP or YourSAP?”
40. Rich Heilman does not need ST22 – he is fixing bugs just by logging into the system.




Dump en SAP

octubre 12, 2008

Qué cachondos estos alemanes.

Dump SAP

Dump SAP


marzo 27, 2008

     ¡¡¡Sapea, sapea!!!

El Abap4 mola mogollón,
Lo “tien” en Alemania
y también en Alcorcón.

Pon Abap4
en tu empresita,
que es una cosa
que queda bonita.

Lo pone Coritel
lo pone Sapinsa
lo pone hasta Drago
aquí todos pillan!

Se implanta FI
Se implanta APO
Se implanta lo quieras
con billete en la mano

Y el abap4 se pone así:
2-Los ALV’S
4-El batch-inpún

Aprende el Abap4,
Aprende el Abap4,
Lo aprenden los ciencias también los letras

Lo aprenden los telecos,
lo aprenden los de empresa,
lo aprende mi padre
y tb mi abuela

Lo aprende el cliente,
Quedandose a rallas,
y el Gerente le dice:
¿Porque no usas ABAP?

En la panadería
del padré Damián,
Pusieron Abap4
y la empresa a triunfar

¡¡¡Triunfar!! ¡¡Triunfar, TRIUNFAAAARRR!!!

Y el abap4 se programa así:
2-Los ALV’S
4-El batch-inpún

Darth Ellison vs ABAP

junio 6, 2006

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Tarifas a preguntas al Soporte de SAP

agosto 21, 2003

1) Respuesta a una pregunta fácil 1 EUR
2) Respuesta que requiere pensar algo 2 EUR
3) Respuesta correcta 4 EUR
4) Respuesta sin leer siquiera la pregunta GRATIS

SAP Statements

agosto 21, 2003

These overestimated statements look forward to advising you about comments that you will likely hear often.

  • It is based on a spider net, too many ways to reach the same point
  • Why simplify if we can make it harder
  • Germans are portugues who have learned mathematics
  • The headoffice pressure is the best ‘stimulus’ to implement R/3
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Cuando un consultor SAP muere

agosto 21, 2003

Un consultor de SAP muere y se acerca a las puertas del cielo donde él encuentra a San Pedro. San Pedro le dice al consultor de SAP, ” Bien, Ud ha llevado una vida media bastente buena, por lo que le dejaré escoger si Ud va al cielo o al diablo “.

Lee el resto de esta entrada »